I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
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