Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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