the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
