I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
