I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
