Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
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