I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i came on her dog
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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