I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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