so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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