This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Are we still banned from the library?
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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