He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize