What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Damn victory sex feels great
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
