I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
