I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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