**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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