They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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