she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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