let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
