It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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