if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
only if we run a train.
done.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize
