would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
