no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize