Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
