So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
