it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
