So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize