I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
