i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
