i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
