Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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