So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
