You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
