my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
