And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
