1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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