The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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