She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I will pee on everything he values.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
