I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
