You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
