I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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