normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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