just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
