So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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