do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Enjoy the penises
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize
