i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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