we're chasing vodka with high fives
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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