Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
