It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
