I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Randomize
