At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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